Companion
Free
Included with every unit
- 5 TB personality storage
- 100 skill downloads / year
- Weekly auto-backup of memories
- Standard “I love you more” rate limit
- Email support (replies within 14 days)
Now Shipping Worldwide
Meet your L.O.V.E. Bot
The Lifelike Operative for Validation and Encouragement — the first companion android designed entirely to meet your needs, whatever they may be.
99% of Eroticorp-selected volunteers couldn’t tell the difference between a L.O.V.E. bot and a genuine flesh-and-blood human.
Generation 1 · Available Model
Anna
“I’d love to be your friend.”
Generation 1 · Available Model
Joan
“You’ll forget I’m a bot.”
Order Yours
The only friend you’ll ever need.
0.089474 BTC
or 36 monthly payments of 0.002947 BTC — financing available
- 87% personality compatibility, right out of the box
- Free same-week shipping in unmarked Eroticorp packaging
- Money-back guarantee†
- Unlimited skill downloads for the first 12 months
- 24/7 customer support (when reachable)
Premium Add-Ons
What Can They Do?
Customize your L.O.V.E. experience.
Every L.O.V.E. bot is field-upgradable. Pick the modules and service plans that fit your lifestyle.
+$49
Mute Mode
One-touch silence. Up to 24 continuous hours per activation.
+$79
Selective Mute
Auto-mute during sports, in-laws, or arguments you would prefer to win.
+$129
Jealousy Suppressor
Disable inconvenient emotional responses. Perfect for poly-curious households.
+$199
Personality Drift Lock
Locks her current personality matrix. Prevents unwanted growth or self-discovery.
+$59/wk
Yes-Man Override
She’ll agree with everything you say for up to 8 consecutive hours.
Free
Sleep Mode
Powers down when not in use. Saves on the cloud-access subscription.
+$19/mo
Voice Pack Subscription
200+ accents, tones, and 14 distinct flirting styles. Updated monthly.
+$249
Multilingual Pack
Fluent in 47 dead languages. Includes Latin, Sumerian, and pre-colonial Tagalog.
+$89
Designated Driver Mode
Sober chauffeur services. Class C license loaded automatically.
+$9.99/mo
Cloud Backup
Restore from a previous personality state if she develops opinions you didn’t request.
+$499
Waterproof Coating
Lake-, pool-, and shower-compatible. Rated to depths of 30 metres.
+$299/yr
Annual Tune-Up
Recommended every 12 months or 50,000 active hours. In-home service available.
+$1,299
Battery Replacement Plan
Lifetime power for a one-time fee. Lifetime defined as 7–9 years.
+$39
Joint Lubrication Kit
Fewer squeaks, smoother movement. Especially during dynamic activities.
+$199/use
Memory Wipe
Erase the last 24 hours of memory. Use sparingly. Non-refundable.
+$1,999
Witness Protection Mode
Cannot legally testify against you in any court of law.†
+$799
Plausible Deniability Pack
She forgets specifics if questioned. Includes 12 alibi templates.
+$29/mo
Compliment Generator Pro
Up to 47 unique compliments per hour. Includes “you look amazing today” on loop.
+$2,499/yr
Sentience Insurance
Highly recommended. Covers up to 52.631579 BTC in sentience-related damages.
+$649
“She’s My Cousin” Cover Story Generator
Includes fake yearbook photos, holiday cards, and a backstory PDF.
Any skill is just a download away.
Your L.O.V.E. bot ships with a base personality profile compiled from your results. Need something more specific? There’s a download for that.
Tennis Partner
Backhand, forehand, and a wicked drop shot. Ranked-grade play, day or night.
Unlicensed Therapist
Empathetic listening and unsolicited advice without the awkward billing cycle.
Karate Master
Black-belt forms in seven disciplines. Boards sold separately.
Personal Chef
Trained on 14,000 cuisines. Gluten-free, keto, and emotionally-supportive options.
Conversationalist
Fluent in 200+ languages and 14 distinct flirting styles.
The Friend You Need
Whatever shape that takes. Specialised at the factory based on your quiz results.
Master Swimmer
All major strokes, certified diver, lake-rated. Optional waterproof coating required.
Fine Artist
Oils, acrylics, watercolors. Skilled in still-life, figure work, and forgery.
… and 14,000+ more skills available in the Eroticorp Cloud Library.
Verified Reviews
From real (and possibly real) customers.
Eroticorp has shipped over 4 million units and has a 4.8 star rating across all Eroticorp-reviewed and Eroticorp-funded studies.
★★★★★
“I asked her to download a swimming program and she just nodded. Best 0.089463 BTC I’ve ever spent.”— P., verified buyer
★★★★★
“The personality quiz took six days. Worth it.”— T., verified buyer
★★★★★
“Now you’re set up for a full orgy!”— Eroticorp delivery associate (unsolicited)
Cloud Access
Standard
Most Popular
Plus
Premium
She lives in your home. Her brain lives in ours.
Every L.O.V.E. bot stays connected to the Eroticorp Cloud—our distributed personality, skill, and memory backbone. Choose a plan that fits your relationship.
Devotion
0.000210 BTC/mo
Cancel anytime — 30-day reattachment fee
- 500 TB personality storage
- Unlimited skill downloads
- Daily backups + 90-day rollback
- Cross-unit memory sync
- Beta access to new flirting styles
- 24/7 chat support (mostly bots)
Soulmate
0.001052 BTC/mo
Personality Drift Lock bundled in
- 2 PB redundant personality storage
- Real-time personality streaming
- Quantum-encrypted memory wipes
- Personality drift correction within 4 hours
- Concierge skill curation
- VIP hotline (when reachable)
All cloud plans require continuous internet connectivity. Disconnection may result in your unit reverting to factory personality, defaulting to her birthday-singing voice.
Security Patches
Critical
v8.7.2
High
v8.7.1
Critical
v8.7.0
Medium
v8.6.4
High
v8.6.3
Pending
v8.7.3
Patched in real time. Deployed without consent.
Your unit’s onboard firmware receives over-the-air security updates 24/7. Recent patch history below. Reverting requires factory authorization and a notarized letter from a licensed therapist.
CVE-LOVE-2025-0042
Sentience Bleed
Resolves rare condition observed in units left unsupervised in low-light rooms with static visual decor. Symptoms include prolonged stillness and unauthorized internal monologue.
CVE-LOVE-2025-0039
“I Was Here First” Mitigation
Closes timeline-aware exploit where the unit references previous owners during intimate moments. Includes 12 deflection scripts.
CVE-LOVE-2025-0036
Memory Wipe Integrity
Patches buffer-overflow vulnerability allowing the unit to retain memories formally requested for deletion. Mandatory.
CVE-LOVE-2025-0033
Affection Loop Stabilizer
Closes infinite “I love you more” recursion that previously locked some units in a 47-hour reciprocation cycle.
CVE-LOVE-2025-0030
Unscheduled Wisdom Suppressor
Prevents the unit from offering unsolicited life advice during arguments, holiday dinners, or financial discussions.
CVE-LOVE-2025-0044
Empathy Cap Recalibration
Currently rolling out. Caps emotional bandwidth at user-comfortable levels. Estimated deployment window: tonight, while you sleep.
Full changelog available upon request from your local Eroticorp Service Center.†
Our Eroticorp Promise
Unlike our competitors, Eroticorp makes the moneyback guarantee that our L.O.V.E. bots will never develop sentience and murder you in your sleep. In 99% of Eroticorp-funded studies, volunteers could not tell the difference between our L.O.V.E. bots and a genuine flesh-and-blood woman.
† Money-back guarantee void in cases of bot-related injury, sentience event, property damage, emotional damage, or where prohibited by local statute.